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In this hilarious episode my guest is Eileen, one of the best storytellers and one of Tony's and my favorite people.
The laughter starts immediately when Eileen begins telling the story about her husband's cat, Mr. Toes, that they had entered into their first cat show, in San Antonio. Tony was laughing so hard he had to leave the room.
And when he returned to listen to the show Eileen and I were laughing about Eileen's hilarious story about her sister Dean's barrel racing experience on a racehorse named Hummer. So once again, Tony had to leave The Last Resort Recording Studio aka Cousin Nancy's kitchen, because he could not quit laughing.
Then a few minutes later when Tony had calmed down and returned again, Eileen had me laughing about her story about this monkey riding a pony. So Tony immediately turned around, waved goodbye and left the "recording studio," because his back was aching from laughing so much.
And this was not the end of the laugh-a-thon, because Cousin Nancy gives a Cousin Boomer Update followed by Eileen and her trading some pretty funny jokes. And this part is transcribed and has pictures.
Okay. Here’s a Cousin Boomer Update for y’all:
The other day Boomer came over and he was pretty depressed. And he told us that he was so poor he had rubbed cologne, from a magazine, on himself and when I said, “Well you smell good. What are you wearing?”
And Boomer said, “page 17.”
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Now it is My Thought For Today Time!
As I watch this generation try and rewrite our history, I'm sure of one thing: It will be misspelled and have no punctuation.
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Okay now it is Make Me Laugh Time! Thank goodness.
There was this blonde and she won a boat from a contest. Her husband told her she should sell the boat, because there was no water and no fish within fifty miles.
She told him, “Nope I am going to keep it.” So she parked her boat in the back pasture.
A few days later her sister came over and asked her husband, “Where’s my sister?”
And he told her that she was fishing on her boat— in the field.
So the sister walks over to the back fence and hollers, “Debbie what are you doing?”
And the blonde says what does it look like I’m doing? I’m fishing!”
And her sister says, “Well, that is about the dumbest thing that I have ever heard of. You ought to be ashamed of yourself.”
So the blonde put down her rod and real and hollers back, “If I could swim I would come over there and kick your behind.”
Now Tony told me this joke.
On a chilly afternoon a woman took her dog to the grocery store with her. Before she went shopping she rolled the windows down to make sure her dog was comfortable and when she got out of her car, she said, “Now stay. Do you hear me? I said stay.”
And a blonde, sitting in the car beside hers, says, “Why don’t you just put it in Park?”
Now, here are a few cat and dog jokes for y’all:
What do you call a cat who loves to bowl? An alley cat.
What do you call a fluffy male cat asleep on a bed? A Himalayan.
What did the alien say to the cat? Take me to your litter.
What do you give a cat with allergies? An anti-hiss-tamine.
What do you get when you cross a chick with an alley cat? A peeping tom.
Why aren’t cats religious? They’re scared of dogma.
And speaking of show dogs here are a few more jokes:
My dog’s not fat. He’s just a little Husky!
The Dalmatian hid from people because he didn’t want to be spotted.
You’re the best dog in the world. I Shih Tzu not.
In this race, the Weiner takes it all.
I worked all day with no break. It was a Mastiff waste of time.
And this concludes this segment of Make Me Laugh Time.
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Here are pictures of Mr. Toes and Eileen's husband showing off the ribbons and rosette.
And I would also like to thank my dear friend Eileen for being on the show and telling us a few of her hilarious stories.
Y’all take care and keep on laughing! Adios y’all!