33 Miners Rescued!

Since yesterday was one crazy day for me, today has been a great day—thanks to Marcie and a nice man named Ronnie Eckert.

Yesterday, I had planned to catch up with all kinds of things, but early in the morning right after I had walked six miles I got a phone call from a sweet seventy-year-old woman who wanted to adopt one of our older dogs, because her fifteen year old dog had passed away and she had just received her dogs ashes.

She wanted to adopt our ten year old dog, because she had seen her on the website and she told me that our dog looked just like her dog that she loved and had cremated. An hour later before our telephone conversation ended we made a plan.

After lunch Tony and I took our dog to Hoegemeyer's Animal Clinic to get her groomed. Two hours later we met this sweet lady at the clinic and forty-five minutes later (She likes to talk.) the woman adopted our dog and took her home. Tone and I were thrilled for our old dog, but not for long.

This morning at six-thirty while I was feeding the dogs, this woman called to tell me that she was sad, but wanted to return our dog to us, because she felt our dog was not happy and it took her forty-two minutes to explain why, without me hardly ever saying a word—bless her heart. I really liked this sweet, little old lady and I wish that it had worked out for both of them, but I understood. When she returned our old dog, she, not the old woman, raced to her pen to join her buddy, Chuck and she was wild with happiness to be reunited with him. I guess you could say it was a happy ending after all.

I spent the early afternoon returning as many phone calls and e-mails as I could, before I went over to the Lodge at three-thirty for my one hour massage appointment—compliments of Marcie, for an early birthday present from her and that is when I met Ronnie, the terrific massage therapist.

"Hi Ronnie, I'm Nancy," I said, as he was finishing up with Marcie, outside on the front porch of her trailer. "You're a brave man to come out here, Ronnie, because I'm fixin' to be fifty-nine and probably the oldest woman that you have ever massaged and I want to apologize in advance, because my body ain't what it used to be." Ronnie, Marcie and her friends Paz and Deborah laughed.

"The oldest woman that I have ever massaged was in her nineties," Ronnie said, as Marcie got off of his massage table. "You're next," he said to me, as he handed me a robe to go put on.

"But I am probably the oldest woman that you have ever massaged outdoors," I said, as I walked inside the trailer to take off my clothes. Before undressing I leaned out the door and asked Marce if the plumbing was working, because nature was calling. When she told me no, I went outside behind the trailer and watered some weeds. Then I went back inside the trailer, because I am modest and removed my clothes and put on the robe. Even though I was naked, I felt really naked when I pulled off my cap.

(It is now 8:06 and I just saw the 33rd Miner in Chile rescued and I love it and obviously so does the rest of world!)

As Ronnie massaged my tired, worn out, old body I started laughing and told him about a show that I had seen on Oprah a while back about famous hairstylists telling their horror stories. "This one uppity woman from New York told Oprah about finding a tick on a woman's head after she washed her hair and she was horrified and so was Oprah and the other hairstylists. People who don't live in the country don't get it. Heck, if you walk under a tree in the country they fall on you and this morning I found a tick crawling up my arm." Everyone started laughing. "Before I came over, Ronnie, I had T. check me for ticks." Ronnie started laughing.

"Ronnie, in my blog tonight I am going to say, that you said, "Well, I only found two ticks on you and the oil must have killed all of those fleas,"" I joked, as I relaxed and enjoyed his incredibly great massage for twenty minutes and then the "show" started or should I say, "All H*$# broke out!

OMG! A UPS truck drove past us, with me laying naked under a black sheet on Marcie's front porch! Then a few minutes later Kinky walks down from the Lodge with Sophie to visit and I was more than mortified. A few minutes later after he and his shadow (Sophie) left, a black car pulls up about twenty-five feet from where I was laying-in-state for the world to pay its respect to or to laugh at. "Who is that?" Marcie asked.

I looked up and waved at the vehicle, "Oh, that's Lisa, one of our great volunteers," I explained, as I waved again.

"Is Lisa a man?" Marcie asked, as Ronnie's fingers worked their magic on me. I looked up and realized that it wasn't Lisa—instead it was a young man and a young lady, so Marcie got up and went to find out who they were. A few minutes later Marcie returned. "They are a young couple from New York City that just got married and they wanted to meet Kinky..."

As the young couple climbed up the hill to the Lodge—Floyd Potter, a friend of the Friedman family that was visiting for a few days, walks up! "I've been in the woods right over there..." Floyd says, as he sits down to visit, as every muscle in my body stiffens—thinking "I bet he saw me pee behind the trailer!" So, I start laughing. Then Tony shows up with his camera!

"Just shoot me, Tony," I said, followed by a laugh, "with a gun. I've been on display for over an hour and..."

I want to thank Marcie Friedman for my free birthday massage and I want to thank Ronnie for the best massage that I have ever had. If you want a fantastic massage in Kerrville please call of go to the "Head To Toe Day Spa" and ask for Ronnie Eckert. They are located four doors down from Trisha's & Rodney's—Copies Plus!

I have got to go to bed now, because I am doing The Harley Show in the morning at 7:45 and then a book signing at 2:00 at the Medina Community Library. Wish me luck.

Y'all have a great evening!

How About It!

Continued from Monday's post:

When Tony and I walked into Wolfmueller's Books we were instantly greeted by Sandy and Jon. Kathleen, a mutual friend of ours was there, too, so we started visiting and the laughing commenced immediately. Fifteen minutes later after Kathleen had told us a couple of hilarious stories about a friend of hers, I told T. that we needed to leave, because my back was aching from laughing so much.

Our next stop was at Copies Plus, so Tony could pick up a book on photography that Trisha was going to loan to him. Trisha and Marcie greeted us as we walked inside and then Trisha started laughing. "Tony I forgot to bring your book," Trish confessed. "I found it and put it on the table so I wouldn't forget it and I forgot it. If y'all have some more errands to run I can run home and get it for you?" We told Trish that we would be back in about an hour and took off for Walmart to buy more dog food for our rescued dogs.

An hour later Marcie greeted us as we walked back inside Copies Plus. Then Trisha came out of a room with a big, blue book, the new manual of PHOTOGRAPHY  by John Hedgecoe. "You will love this book, Tony," she said as she handed it to him. "Nancy, I'm nearly finished mounting your poster that you ordered and it turned out great!" Then she left the work area, so we visited with Marcie.

A few minutes later Trisha returned to the main work area holding up the poster I had ordered and I loved it! It's a picture of the front cover of my new book, Meanwhile Back At The Rescue Ranch: The Dog Days of Cousin Nancy. I had ordered the poster, because I wanted to hang it in the Space Ship.

As I was paying Trisha for the poster a familiar looking woman walked into the store and greeted all of us. When she saw my poster laying on the countertop she walked over to it to get a better look at it. "I love the cover of your new book, Cousin Nancy. Do you remember me?" I nodded my head, even though I couldn't figure out who she was. "I'm Kim Williamson from the television station Kerrville 15. I interviewed you years ago."

"Yes, I remember, Kim," I said. "I really enjoyed being on your show even though Sponge Bob Diaper Pants nearly ruined it." I looked at Trisha and Marcie. "Sponge Bob was a giant thirty-pound Lab puppy and he had an accident in his crate and he was covered in poop and it was raining and we were running late. When I did the interview he laid across my lap peacefully sleeping and smelled to high heaven. I was wearing pink overalls and a white shirt and after the show was over I realized that I was covered in poop and looked like I had been in a mud wrestling event and had lost. I wrote about it in my first book. I think I titled the story, Oh, Crappy Day."

"I would love to do a show on you and your new book. How about it?" Kim asked. As Kim and I discussed doing the show Tony went outside to get a book for her from our newly named  96' Explorer—Buttermilk, the Book Mobile. After I signed the book to her, she handed me a couple of business cards and then Tony and I left Copies Plus and headed home in the book mobile.

When we got home I returned a couple of phone calls and then I checked my e-mail. After answering eighteen new e-mails a new e-mail popped into my mailbox and it was from my dear friend, 'Erb, who lives in Massachusetts with his beautiful wife, Karen. She's the woman who has made me those two beautiful necklaces that everyone compliments me on.

As I read 'Erb's note I burst out laughing when he told me that every time that he reads the name of my small publishing press, Undepressable Press, it immediately reminds him of Nat King Cole's song, "Unforgettable" and it makes him want to dance. He said that if you substitute the word unforgettable to undepressable it works with the lyrics. When I showed Tony 'Erbs note he started laughing and I am still laughing about it.

After I got off of the computer I went inside the Space Ship and hung my poster up on the wall.

Tuesday afternoon I had a nice surprise. Our good friends, neighbors and volunteers, Charlie Cooper and his ninety-year-old father, Mr. Cooper came out to bring me some gifts. Unfortunately, Tony was gone fishing and Ellen, Charlie's better half, (Just kidding, Charlie. Not really.) was down at the Coast visiting family.

When they arrived we into the Space Ship so I could show it off. Then Charlie told me that he and Ellen had a gift that they wanted to give to me—a 1958 Roy Roger & Dale Evans lunch box with the thermos!

After telling Charlie that I loved it we started visiting. Charlie told me about his and Ellen's fun trip to Terlingua, Texas with their grandson, Catfish. Then he reached into his pocket and gave me several beautiful rocks that they had found. "I love the rocks, Charlie. I'm going to keep them in the Space Ship and tell everyone that they are Moon Rocks!"

Then we visited with Mr. Cooper, who I adore and think the world of, and listened to his interesting stories about his incredible life. When it was time for them to leave, because they needed to go to Kerrville to get supplies, Charlie gave me a small cactus that that they had found and I thought it was dead. After I thanked him for giving me the dead cactus, Charlie laughed and said, "It's not dead, Nancy. They call it a living rock and it grows outward instead of upward. This cactus is approximately thirty years old, too. They grow about an inch every ten years..." After they drove away I went into Outer Space and planted it in a pot.

When T. came home forty minutes later, he was sick that he had missed them.

Yesterday, I discovered that eBay has a great deal for raising funds through eBay Giving Works, so I spent much of my day registering Utopia Animal Rescue Ranch to be on their charitable list. The way it works is if you choose to sell something on eBay but want to make a donation to our rescue ranch, you go to eBay Giving Works' Utopia's site to sell the item and it is that simple. And you can choose what percentage of your sale that you want to donate to Utopia. They have made it very simple. And, I have put a link to it on the side bar, so you can check it out.

After we were officially registered on eBay Giving Works, I went on Utopia Facebook to announce it and to let everyone know about David Woo's print of Kinky and our pig that is for sale. This is what I posted:

"David Woo is an outstanding photographer from Dallas who shot Kinky with one of our pigs a few years ago, for his and Richard Pruitt's star-studded coffee table book Top Dogs And Their Pets. . 

David has generously donated 10 - 19"X13" black and white prints, signed and numbered by him and Kinky for us to auction off to raise money for our rescue ranch! David told me that the posters should be sold for a minimum of $250.00 each, but since we're trying to raise money for the rescue ranch now, we've decided to cut the number in half and sell them for $125.00 each. So hurry! We only have ten prints to sell with 100% of the proceeds going to the Utopia Animal Rescue Ranch and its tax deductible.

To purchase one of these prints please go to Utopia's donation page on eBay Giving Works. I can only post one poster at a time to sell, so when one sells I will post another one up as soon as possible. Thank you for helping us help them!"

This morning I was flabbergasted when I saw the number of people who have already signed up to sell their items and give a percentage of their sell to Utopia Animal Rescue Ranch! And, I want to thank them for their generosity and support.

This morning Meghann and Matt came out and helped Tony with his chores, while Jim walked our dogs for us. Thank you, Meghann, Matt and Jim for all that you do for our ranch. We love y'all.

I feel good that I am finally caught up with my blog and the latest news. 

(P.S. Tomorrow is Tony's Birthday!)

Y'all have a great evening!

Artamon, NSW, Australia!

Today has been a good day. This morning after breakfast while Tony was outside doing his morning chores, I started walking with Leslie and before I had finished my six miles I had decided that I needed to do a little trailer feng shuiing.

After I had started a load of laundry in Queen Bee I turned on my trusty, Himalayan salt lamp, to up the vibes and then I put on some New Age music and cranked up the volume on our Bose iDock. After lighting a stick of Naga Champa incense—I started smudgin' the trailer with some sweet grass, that my friend Cindy had given to me before she moved away to New Mexico last August. I wasn't sure if the sweet grass was going to be powerful enough since it was over a year old, but I used it anyway.

As little plumes of smoke floated above the stick of burning incense that was sitting in the middle of kitchen sink and disappeared into thin air, while filling the air with a better smell and the New Age music was putting "elevator music" to shame—Tony walked inside the trailer and half-hollered for me, "Nance, where are you?"

"In the bathroom!" I half-hollered back. "I'm smudging the bathroom and I'm nearly finished smudging the trailer. Why?" (Let's just say that T. is not real fond of me smudging our trailer or anything else, because it kind of freaks him out when I smudge or start talking about ghosts, fairies and that kind of stuff.)

"Is your poltergeist back?" He asked nervously, as I walked back into the kitchen with a small bowl of burning, sweet grass.

"No, Tone. I just wanted to feng shui the trailer this morning and I needed to smudge the trailer first before I start feng shuiing. That's all..." After we talked, Tony went back to his office to do some virtual plowing on his Facebook farm.

When I was done smudgin' I grabbed my favorite Feng Shui book, Feng Shui For Dummies off of the the bookshelf and sat down and did a little reading to refresh my brain. Twenty minutes later I knew what I should do first—I closed the book and then put the lids down on our toilets. Then I went back to Tony's office. "Tone, from here on out you need to keep the lids down on our toilets. It says that when abundance comes into your trailer it goes right down the drain if the lid is up. I just closed them. Okay?" Tony nodded his head as he busily harvested some pretend plants.

Then I came into the big room and called Wolfmueller's Books."Hi,  Jon, this is Nancy. I have decided to feng shui our trailer today." Jon started laughing.

"Really. What are you going to do?"

"Well I just put the lids down on our toilets." Jon burst out laughing. "No, seriously, Jon."

"Cousin Nancy says that we need to put the lids down on our toilets!" Jon said to Sandy. "Sandy wants to know why?" I could faintly hear Sandy laughing in the background as Jon and I laughed.

After I explained the reason for keeping the lids down I said, "Jon, I want to sell off some of my book collection. You know—less is more and I haven't read any of those old books for years. Can you tell me how to price them?" After Jon told me a website to check out for book pricing I thanked him and ended our conversation and then went online to the website he had recommended to check out some book titles and see how much I should sell my old books for.

Unfortunately, the books that I was thinking of selling off were selling for one or two dollars and the shipping was more than the books cost—not good news. I guess that says a lot about what kind of books I like to read.

After realizing that my big book collection was valued at fifty dollars or less I decided to check on my first book that I wrote for the University of Texas Press in 2006, The Road To Utopia: How Kinky, Tony & I Saved More Animals Than Noah and I was shocked!

Good grief, I could not believe the prices! My signed hardbacks were selling for seventy-five dollars in Austin, LaPorte, Texas, Exeter and Saffron in the United Kingdom, and Artamon, NSW. Australia! We're talkin' a big ego boost here. I was elated to say the least.

After lunch Buttermilk took T. and me to Kerrville to buy dog food and to run a few errands at Wolfmueller's Books and Copies Plus.
To Be Continued...

Y'all have a great evening! It looks like I am fixing to be on TV, again. I will tell you about it tomorrow.

P.S. Thunder is sleeping next to my chair beside my feet. Today was a good day for her.

A Big Backpack Should Have Been A Fanny Pack!

Today has been really fun even though I overslept this morning and didn't wake up until eight-thirty (which would have been seven-thirty if we hadn't had the stupid time change). This morning while I was walking six miles with Leslie Sansone, Lisa, Matt and Meghann were outside helping Ben and Tony dip our dogs for fleas and ticks.

After walking I cleaned up and dressed in my Easter Egg outfit: pink overalls with an off-white turtleneck and my pretty pink Crocs and then I went outside to lend a hand. When I arrived at the barn everything looked under control and organized and running like clockwork.

Tony and Ben were the official self appointed "Dog Dippers" and Team L&M were fetching and returning the dogs to their pens. After saying hello to everyone I grabbed a leash and took off to Blackie's and Alfie's pen so they could be dipped. An hour later all of our dogs had been dipped, but Tony's and Ben's backs were hurting after lifting all of our dogs into and out of the trough.

Then I had a really fun visit with everyone. We teased Lisa about being covered in mud and Matt for accidentally letting Randy Travis escape from his pen. Then Lisa told Ben about loving his chocolate and she asked him when he was going to bring some more out. "I'll bring some the next time that I come out, but you can now buy it at the H.E.B in Kerrville." I was shocked when Ben said that.

"Miles of Chocolate is now in Kerrville!" I said. "That is fantastic news, Ben! Where is it in the store?"

"You can get it at their Deli section."

"I'm going straight to H.E.B. to buy some after we leave here," Lisa said. Fifteen minutes later Team L&M said goodbye to Team BNT and they took off for the H.E.B. in Kerrville. Then we talked about them needing to get cleaned up and what I was cooking for lunch.

"I can fix some spaghetti and meatballs," I said. "While you and Tony go take showers and get cleaned up." Ben jumped into his truck and headed for the Lodge and I jumped into Kermit with Tony and we headed for the trailer.

While Tone was taking a shower I put the H.E.B. fully cooked meatballs into the oven to warm and then I filled a pan with water and put in the spaghetti to cook. Then I discovered that I was out of Ragu so I threw out the uncooked spaghetti and went to Plan B.—beans and cornbread with meatballs.

Tony and Ben were a little surprised when I told them about the menu change and believe it or not our lunch was really tasty and the guys cleaned their plates before I cleaned their plates.

After lunch June, Ellen, Eileen and Ellen's visiting friends Kent and Joan from Columbus, Mississippi came out to walk our dogs so we went outside to greet them and to thank them for coming out. I ended up going for a dog walk with them and I had as much fun as our dogs did.

June, Eileen and Ellen had me laughing from the git-go because they are so funny and I was fascinated listening to Kent and Joan telling me about how they had met. "Joan is from South Africa. We met in the Red Sea. She and I were both working in Saudi Arabia and we loved scuba diving... " Kent said. Then I took off and joined June and Joan to visit with them.

Joan told me about what it is like to be a woman living in Saudi Arabia and how the women are treated and I could not believe it, but I did. "It makes me glad to be living in the U.S.A.," June said. After all of the dogs were returned to their pens we had a fun visit by the barn.

"I just found out that you can buy Ben's chocolate at the H.E.B in Kerrville! Ben just told me earlier this morning." June, Eileen and Ellen were delighted with my news and then we told Joan and Kent about Miles of Chocolate being voted Austin's Favorite Chocolate for the past three years. Then the subject changed to arrowheads.

"There are arrowheads laying around everywhere out here—thanks to Ben." I said as Ben and Tony laughed. "Several years ago Ben played a joke on Tone. Ben got ahold of a lot of fake arrowheads and he scattered them all over the ranch for Tony to find..."

"I drove all around the ranch and just flung them out the window," Ben said as we all laughed. Then I asked Joan about the snakes and the spiders in South Africa because of my spider bite.

 Joan told us about two deadly snakes in South Africa where her family still lives and then she said the funniest thing. "South Africa is beautiful and the Texas Hill Country reminds me of it. People in South Africa can rent caves with nearby water to get back to nature and relax. One time I rented a cave and one day I decided to go backpacking naked into the forest and..." Her words pricked my ears so I interrupted her.

"You went backpacking—naked?" Everyone started laughing. Joan blushed and nodded her head yes.

"Yes, Nancy," Joan said, "but I had a big backpack, but I am embarrassed to say that my butt got awfully sunburned..." Everyone was laughing and making wisecracks. "It was very secluded and no people were there." Then the subject changed but I couldn't quit thinking about going backpacking—naked because I can't even go barefoot inside the trailer or anywhere else.

Then Ellen and Eileen told us a hilarious story about when they were kids growing up in Mississippi and unknowingly being a cover for an old man who was making moonshine when he took them horseback riding into the woods. "He would always tell us to stop about halfway into our ride and tell us to ride on and he would meet up with us on the trail," Eileen said. "We'd go on and then thirty minutes later he would appear out of nowhere and finish the ride with us."

"We never knew," Ellen laughingly said. "We didn't find out until years later that he was making moonshine."

"Y'all should call yourselves "The Moonshine Girls," I said. We visited for about twenty more minutes and then they had to leave. After they left I returned to the trailer and checked my e-mail and I am thrilled that I did.

Trisha at Copies Plus had sent me a proof of her conversion of the  cover that I had designed for the book and it looked fantastic! And the tweaks that she suggested were perfect. She is so talented. Thank you, Trisha! I love it! Here is a picture of Kent, Eileen and Ellen with Princess and Marlin.

This is a picture of Joan and June with Tom Landry and Buffalo Girl

P.S. This evening Ben told me about a metal sculpture that he has started working on and he needs used saw blades. If any of y'all have any old round saw blades and you want to help Ben, please send them to me at the rescue ranch.

Y'all have a great evening!

Where's The Chair!

This morning at seven forty-five I called The Rose at 99.9 to do The Harley Show and it was so much fun. Randy Sanders of The Save Inn Restaurant was in the studio with Harley and we had a fun time. When Harley asked me to tell Randy the Eternal Squirrel story we couldn't quit laughing. And today Ms. Sparky was Harley's Pet of the Week.

After breakfast I walked six more miles and then I went outside to say hello to all of the dogs and to Lisa, Meghan and Matt. After I had petted every dog and told them that I loved them and their tails wagged, Lisa drove up as they were leaving and she told me that she loved my baby pink overalls that I was wearing with my matching pink Crocs and ecru colored turtleneck, and she wanted to know where I bought my overalls. "Thank you, Lisa. I also have a lavender pair too and you can't buy them—you have to make them pink. Go to Gibson's and buy the white painters overalls and some baby pink dye. It is really easy to dye them and..."

After Team L&M drove away, a pickup entered the rescue ranch as I was walking up to the trailer. I knew who was coming in so I threw a rock at the trailer so Tony would come outside and help me put Clark Kent into a pen.

Yesterday Susie called to tell me that they loved Clark Kent but they had to return him because he was taller than Marcus when he stood up on his hind legs and Marcus was scared of him when he jumped up on him. They were sick about having to return Clark to us. They felt that Marcus needed a much smaller dog. And she told me that Clark Kent was one of the best dogs that they had ever had. "He's a perfect dog."

When Clark Kent got out of the pickup his tail was wagging wildly when he saw us and then Tony took Clark to a pen while Ron gave me Clark's paperwork, toys, bowls and heart worm medicine. After Ron drove off I went to Clark's pen where he was playing with Tone. "He's happy and is going to be fine, Nance," Tony said as Clark kissed him repeatedly on his cheek. We love that dog.

After lunch while I was outside visiting with Clark Kent‚ Jon Wolfmueller called and left a message for me. When I came back inside I listened to Jon's message, "Nancy, Donna "The Drummer" Schloss was just in here. She bought a ukulele next door at Hill Country Music and she asked me to call you and tell you that she hopes that you will take the beginner's ukulele class with her at three oclock today." Then he started laughing and said, "Call me."

I thought about it for a minute and then I half-hollered down the hall, "Tone! I want to take that ukulele course with Donna. What do you think? "

"Do it!" Tone softly yelled back as he was doing farm work. So I picked up the phone and punched in Wolfmueller's Books phone number and Jon answered the phone. He laughed when I told him that I was going to take the one hour class and then he suggested that I call Hill Country Music next door to them to see if they had anymore ukuleles.

After Jon gave me the music store's phone number I called Randy at Hill Country Music. "Hi, Randy. This is Cousin Nancy. Jon Wolfmueller just called me and told me that Donna "The Drummer" Schloss, who I guess is now going to be called Donna "The Uke" Schloss was just in there and she bought a ukulele from you. I have decided to take the class with her and I need to buy a uke from you too. Can you please tell me the prices of your ukuleles?"

We arrived at Wolfmueller's Books at two-fifteen and thirty seconds later Sandy, Tony and I were next door in the music store. "Randy," Sandy said. "Cousin Nancy needs to buy a ukulele from you."

As Randy shook hands with me a man standing at the counter said, "Well hello, Cousin Nancy! I'm T-Bone. I work with Harley over at the Rose and..." So I shook his hand too. Then Randy showed me his cheapest ukulele and I told him that I liked it and would take it. After writing him a check for $98.72 Sandy, Tony and I left the store and returned to Wolfmueller's Books. Then Sandy gave us directions to where the ukulele class was being held and Tone and I took off for Copies Plus to pick up his new postcards because we had a little time to kill.

While Tony was inside Copies Plus I stayed inside Buttermilk and quickly studied the ukulele chord chart because I had forgotten the chords because I haven't played a uke since I was seven or eight years old. When Tony walked out of Copies Plus he was wearing a big grin on his face. When he got into Buttermilk he said, "They turned out great! Look!" I "looked" as he drove me to my class on Guadalupe Street. His postcards were absolutely beautiful and I told him so. He is such a great photographer.

My one hour ukulele class was so much fun and Betty, the instructor was a great teacher. And Donna sat next to me with her new pineapple shaped ukulele! Before the class began Betty asked all of us to introduce and tell everyone about ourselves and it was hilarious. Several of the senior citizens were retired lawyers from Houston with great sense of humors and one woman was a retired Private Investigator etc. When it was my turn I said, "My name is Nancy and I am the Executive Director for the Utopia Animal Rescue Ranch and I..."

"You're Cousin Nancy!" several people said and I shook my head yes and then I turned about five shades of red and then I continued on. Then it was Donna's turn, and then we started strumming. By the end of the fun class I thanked Betty and told her how much I had enjoyed it, and told her that I would be coming back.

We had a surprise waiting for us when we returned to the rescue ranch. As we pulled up to the trailer I said, "Oh My God, Tony! Look where your  Photo Booth is!" Then we started laughing. The gusting winds had blown it about seventy feet and it was laying on its side— rocking back and forth outside our front yard fence near the Eternal Squirrel.

Here is a short one minute and forty-two second video clip of Tony's Mobile Photo Booth Blowing In The Wind.  And this one is a funny thirty-four second video where Tony asks me, "Where's the chair?"

Y'all have a great evening!

Sure I'll Do It!

This morning after I walked six miles I went over to Kinky's for a short visit. When I told him about trying to sell one of his books on eBay he had a light bulb moment. "Nance, why don't you sell my pool table on eBay and sell it?" Kinky said with enthusiasm. "We could split it half and half..."

"Sure, I'll do it but are you sure that you really want to sell your pool table?"

"Yes. I have been thinking about selling it for the past two years..."

The thought of trying to sell Kinky's pool table for him excited me so I came home, grabbed my camera and then returned to the Lodge and shot his pool table and him so I could post the pictures to show people Kinky's pool table. This is the picture I took of him.

When I got home I did paperwork and returned phone calls and then made lunch. After lunch Tony went to Kerrville to pick up his postcards at Copies Plus and then swing by Koyote Ranch to see if they wanted to buy any to sell, while I spent over two hours on the Internet checking prices on used pool table and talking back and forth on the phone to Sandy and Jon at Wolfmueller's Books about selling Kinky's pool table on eBay.

When Tone came home he had great news to tell me. "Nance, the man at Koyote Ranch loved my postcards and he bought ten of each! And he told me that he would be reordering more real soon!" I was thrilled for Tony and told him so. I love his photography.

About an hour ago the phone rang—it was Jon. "Hi, Nancy. It's Jon."

"I know, Jon. I have Calller ID. What's up?"

"Sandy and I wanted to know if it would be okay if we came out to the rescue ranch after we close."

"That sounds great, Jon! I'm glad that you called because I need to go take a shower." Jon laughed. "I can't wait to show you my new toy pig that laughs and moves. I promise that it will make y'all laugh out loud and..."

"We've seen it. We watched your video..." As soon as we hung up, I lit a stick of my Naga Champa incense and then jumped into the shower.

Well it's nearly five-twenty and Sandy and Jon should be arriving out here in about twenty minutes and I am sure that we will have fun tonight! As soon as I put Kinky's pool table up on eBay I will let y'all know so you can go check it out.

Y'all have a great evening!

None!

So far, today has been really fun and filled with surprises. This morning I got up early so I could do the Harley Show. When I got on my laptop to watch and listen to Harley before I called in, I was surprised to see Rick doing the show. At seven-forty-five when I called the station Rick answered the phone and told me off air that Harley was over at the stock show.

When the song that was playing stopped playing that's when we went live on the air. "We have Cousin Nancy on the phone from the Utopia Animal Rescue Ranch. How are you doing?"

"Good morning Rick! I'm doin' just fine."

"That's good," Rick said. "Who is Harley's Pet of the Week?"

"Well, since Harley isn't there, Rick's Pet of the Week is Miss Moose and she is a wonderful four year old black Lab."

"Tell us some more about Miss Moose."

"She is like a doublewide Labrador. She weighs over a hundred and twenty pounds. She's not tall just real wide..." We talked about the rescue ranch for a few minutes then my segment of the show was over. I had fun doing the show with Rick.

After I walked six miles I cleaned up, and then I cleaned up the trailer. At ten-thirty my friend, Sheryl arrived right on time. Sheryl is the kind heart who is helping me edit my book. When she came inside the trailer with my edited pages of the book she surprised me with a gift. She gave me a first edition copy of Two Guys Four Corners by Don Imus & Fred Imus! "Sheryl, you didn't need to bring me a present, heck, your help with the editing is the biggest gift I could ever want or ask for. You are too sweet. Thank you so much."

Sheryl and I spent the morning talking about her edits and the book in general. Even though there are a lot of red marks on every page for me to correct, most of the corrections are to delete  all of the unnecessary commas that I used after every two breaths. I plan to start the editing tonight! Sheryl left around one o'clock. Thank you, Sheryl!

After Tony and I ate lunch I found the Club Ed classes catalog to get the phone number for registration. "Club Ed. This is Bill. How can I help you?" (I think he said Bill, but because I am hard of hearing he might have said Phil.)

"Hi. I'm Nancy Parker-Simons and I want to sign up for a course."

"Great! Which one?"

"The drum course," I said. "Can I sign up for it now on the phone?" After I gave Bill / Phil my name, address, phone number and credit card information he asked me for my e-mail address. "It's Cousin Nancy..."

"Cousin Nancy! You're Cousin Nancy! I listen to you everyday on Harley."

"Well, thank you. I love Harley."

"I'm doing the Harley Show tomorrow morning about Club Ed," the friendly man said. Then we talked about Harley for a few minutes and how much he has done to help the Kerrville community. Then Bill / Phil surprised me and said, "Would you like to teach a course for Club Ed?"

What? I didn't know what to say, so there was a moment of silence, because his question had blown me out of the sadde, so to speak. "Sure. I guess I could teach a writing course as long as it doesn't have anything to do with punctuation, or I could teach a course on how to write a book or something."

"What if you did a course about animal rescue. People could sign up and take a bus down there one day and spend two to three hours."

"Yes, Tony and I could give them a tour, explain what we do and how they can help."

"I like that idea," Bill / Phil said. "We will send you a teacher application. Cousin Nancy, there are still a few openings left to fill for the drum class, so please invite all of your friends to take the course with you." I told him that I would and then we said goodbye to each other.

The first people I thought of who are fun and might want to take the course with me were Mari and The NoMads, Lisa, Matt, Jon & Sandy at Wolfmueller's Books, Donna S., Trisha at Copies Plus, Randy & Lisa at The Save Inn, Carol V., Rick & Leisa, Pete & Kelly and David & Desiree at the Trails End Guest House!

I think it would be a blast to take the drum course with all of them! It would be just like a party, but sadly it would be without Tony, because he hates drumming. Who knows, maybe I could talk the instructor into letting Tony come to the class for just a few minutes so he could take a few videos of us banging our drums slowly on Sunday, February twenty-eighth.

This afternoon Lisa and Kevin came out to the rescue ranch to help Tony replace a water pump and to walk a few dogs for us. T. wanted me to go with them so I went with them. I had a fun visit with everyone even though Tone teased me relentlessly about being scared of the cows and he kept honking the horn trying to get the cows to chase us.

"I am not scared of cows y'all," I said, in self defense. "What I am scared of is when Tony goes to feed them and they chase us to where he feeds them, and they run right beside the window that I am sitting next to! If one of them stumbled, they could fall over and crush me."

"So, how many cows have you seen stumble and fall and crush someone inside a car?" Lisa asked.

"None," I said. Then we all broke out laughing. It took us about thirty minutes to get the pump running and Tony was soaking wet by the time we were done, because he actually did most of the work.

Y'all have a great evening!

No Smoking Please!

It is six-twenty-five, Sunday evening, and I just woke up from a much needed nap. I have much to tell, so here goes.

Saturday morning, when I woke up, I decided to take it slow, before driving up to Dripping Springs. I didn't want to be in such a hurry that I would make myself a nervous wreck, before venturing up to Ronnie's without Tony. Even though I had overslept by an hour, I did my morning chores—feeding my furry kids and getting a load of laundry started.

When Tone returned from Medina, we drank our healthy smoothies, and then he went outside to feed the dogs and to clean their pens, while I began walking with Leslie. Over an hour and a half later, Tony came inside the trailer. "I just walked eight miles!" I bragged to T.

"I just picked up poop from over fifty dogs!" Tone stated with pride. "Don't you need to get on the road?"

"I'm fixin' to," I said. "I've got to get cleaned up and pack. "I will probably be leaving in about an hour or so..."

An hour or so later, I grabbed my guitar, and loaded it into Buttermilk's back seat. Then I packed my portable Bose iDock and eighty gig iPod into my flowery cloth duffle bag, along with some clothes. I carried it, and a new box of fine wine out to Buttermilk. When I returned to the trailer, I put on my favorite necklace, the turquoise one, that Karen Cares, custom made for me a few years ago. Then I put on my Utopia Animal Rescue Ranch blue jean jacket. I was ready to go, but I didn't want to leave Tony and our dogs and Lucky.

After saying goodbye to Toto, Little Girl, Hank, Sr., Thunder, Mama, Abbie and Lucky, I slung my purse over my shoulder and left the trailer. As I was programming Garmina, with Ronnie's address—Tony showed up in Kermit. "Hudson's just been adopted!"

"You're kidding me? Hudson?" I had mixed feelings. I really loved that dog, and I really wanted to adopt him, even though that was impossible, but I was also thrilled that he was getting adopted so quickly.

"No. These two really nice people, Kathleen and Joe, want to adopt him, for their son, Garrett. Do you have time to write up Hudson's paperwork?"

"Yes!" I turned around and went back inside the trailer, and Tone took off in Kermit. Five minutes later, I jumped into Buttermilk and drove down to the barn, where Tony was standing with the soon to be adoptive parents. After introductions, I told them about being in love with Hudson and congratulated them on picking him.

After Hudson's papers were signed, I told them that I was heading out of town, and thought it might be best that I leave without saying goodbye to Hudson, because I didn't want to cry, and then show up at my cousin's reunion all puffy and red-eyed, and having to explain that Tony and I were fine, and a dog had made me cry. Fortunately, they understood. So, they took off with T., and Buttermilk took off with me.

I was one of the last cousins to arrive at the Ronderosa. As soon as I had parked Buttermilk, I called Tony to let him know that I had made it to Ron and Nita's and the next thing you know, I was covered up with cousins! There were no handshakes, just hugs! Of course, everyone had really aged, but me, and all of us were gray headed, except for Suzy, who had always wanted to be a blond.

The fun day was spent catching up with each other's lives, and eating all kinds of snacks, before eating Ron's delicious smoked BBQ dinner hours later. I'm not sure which snack it was that gave me gas, but I had gas so bad, that I seriously thought about making a sign to wear around my neck, that would read: "No Smoking Please!" so, I wouldn't accidentally blow up my cousins who still smoked. I eighty-sixed that thought, because I wanted to show off my necklace.

A couple of hours later, I still had the walking pooh-poohs, so I asked Katelyn, Ron and Nita's beautiful daughter, to go for a long walk with me, so I could blow off a little steam. Two loud miles later, I was a gas free woman! Thank goodness!

When we returned from our windy journey, we walked inside the house, to find Ronnie, Ray, Brock and Tom playing music! Ronnie was playing guitar, Ray was playing dulcimer, Brock was playing banjo, and Tom was playing guitar and mandolin! They sounded great! Then my cousin Tony grabbed me by my jacket! "Get in there, Nance and play with them." I tried to blow him off, but I was out of gas, so to speak. Then Cindy and a few others begged me to pick up my guitar, and play with them. I was out numbered.

Before I grabbed a pickin' stool, I took off for the kitchen, and poured me a glass of fine boxed wine, for false courage. We picked and grinned for over an hour. It was a lot of fun, and I must admit that I played pretty good with them. In fact, I've never played better! When we finally quit playing, my fingers were killing me, and they are still sore.

By eleven o'clock, the reunion was over, and everyone had gone back from where they had come from. Ron, Nita and I sat up and visited for about an hour, then we went off to bed.

I left this morning, before Ronnie and Nita got up. When we reached Fredericksburg, I pulled Buttermilk into Walmart's parking lot, and called Tony to ask him if he wanted to meet me for breakfast at Randy & Lisa's Save Inn, because we were both twenty-two miles away from Kerrville.

Thirty minutes later, I walked into the Save Inn and sat down at a table. Because I am blind as a bat, I didn't see Lisa, sitting at a table with her adorable grandchildren and her daughter-in-law, Trisha, of Copies Plus! Five minutes later, Tone walked into the restaurant and sat down at our table. "Did you say hi to Lisa and Trish over there?" After telling him that I hadn't seen them, he turned around and we waved to them.

As we ate, I told Tony all about the fun cousin reunion, and he nearly choked on his biscuit, when I told him about my gas-capades. "I'm going to the next one," he said.

As always our waitress was great, and so was our breakfast. One of their other friendly waitresses, came over to our table and told us this joke. "Do you know how to fix a broken pumpkin?" We shook our heads no. "With a pumpkin patch!" After paying for our meal, T. and Trigger followed us home.

After unpacking, and starting a load of clothes in Queen Bee, I walked six miles. Then the phone rang—it was Georgia. "Nancy, can I adopt Tasha? I've fallen in love with her..." By the end of our conversation, Tasha had found her forever home! Tony and I were thrilled!

This afternoon, around two o'clock, Kinky called to invite us over to the Lodge, for a visit with Marcie, who had flown in from Hanoi, Vietnam. When we arrived, after hugs, Will, Kinky, Marcie, Tone and I sat down at the kitchen table and had a really fun visit! At one point, Kinky went to his office and came back with a package and handed it to me. "I think this is for you, but I really think it is for me. It's from Germany and I was just over there. Open it and let's find out." I opened it.

It was an old, small picture book, filled with beautiful black and white pictures of dogs and cats. Then I found a folded note tucked in the front of the book. "I think it's for me, Kink," I said, as I looked at the envelope. It says, "To Nancy Parker-Simons, care of K. Friedman..."

"I know, but I bet it is for me," Kinky said. I unfolded the handwritten note. "September fourth. Dear Mrs. Parker-Simons. Kinky it's for me!" Then I went on to read the letter aloud. This nice woman, Gabriele Wernette, wrote to tell me that she loves Kinky and has read everything that he has written and she loves our rescue ranch, and she thanked me for all that we do for the animals. The book was printed in Germany in 1922 and it is beautiful! Thank you Gabriele! I love it!


After telling Kinky the good news about Hudson and Tasha getting forever homes, he went back to his office, again and then returned. "Here's a copy of Kinky's Celebrity Pet Files, for you and Tony." I asked him to sign it for us and he did. He wrote: "For Nancy & Tony, I'm gettin' tired of doing all the work around here. Love, Kinky Friedman 10-11-09!"

Then Marcie got up and left the Lodge. A few minutes later she returned with a few gifts for Tony and me, from Vietnam! She gave us an embroidered shirt, and a mug from the U.S. Embassy! A little birdie tells me that T. and I will be fighting over the mug and shirt real soon!
I have now been writing for over two hours on this blog, I'm now tired, and I'm sure that you're tired of reading it, too.

Y'all have a great gas-free evening!

Picture This!

This afternoon, Tony and I had to go to Kerrville to run some errands. One of the errands, was to go by Copies Plus to pick up some handouts, that I needed to FedEx up to Kim G., for the June 6th Bonefit.

Trish greeted us as we walked in the store, and then she plopped our order down on the counter, while wearing a big grin. “Here’s your order! I hope that you like it.”

I looked at the handouts and they were perfect, and I told her so. Then she, Tony and I discussed another upcoming job and then we visited. At one point, near the end of our conversation, when she told us about knowing how to set the picture size on digital cameras—I opened up my purse and pulled out my little Sony 8.1.

“Could you help me set mine?” I asked. “I love this camera, but it shoots way to big of pictures—like 45 inches by 30 inches, and the size of each picture is 22 to 24 megabytes.”

“Sure,” Trish said. “Let me fix it for you.”

I handed her my camera and was so excited that she could fix the problem. Trish turned on my camera—nothing happened. She then pushed the on button again—still nothing. “Is the battery low?” She asked.

I looked at her and Tony, “No, I just charged it yesterday,” I said. Then it hit me. “I forgot to put the battery back in—it’s at home—still plugged into the wall!” I felt so stupid, but I had to laugh. Tony and Trish joined me in laughter. “Trish, getting old stinks. Stuff like this happens to me all of the time.”

“It’s true,” Tony quipped. “Two days ago, we went to Medina to mail some letters and to buy some stamps, and she forgot to bring the letters!”

“Yes, that’s true,” I said. “But, I did remember to bring a check and bought stamps.” We all laughed again.

Trish then told us to bring my camera back, the next time that we were in Kerrville, and she would be glad to adjust the settings for me. She is so nice.

After leaving Copies Plus, we headed to FedEx, so I could ship Kim G. the handouts. As soon as Tony had parked the car, I realized that I had forgotten to bring the bumper stickers! When I told Tony that I had forgotten to bring them—he broke out laughing, and he was still laughing, when I returned to Buttermilk—after mailing the handouts!

“Nance,” Tony said, as we passed by the orange colored restaurant, “I’m buying you a note pad tomorrow, and a hearing aid for your birthday.”

“What? You’re buying a boat pad? What’s that?”

P.S. Kim G., I'll ship the bumper stickers up there tomorrow! I hope!

Smiling Faces!

Last Thursday, during a conversation with Harley on his radio show, he told me that our friends, Randy and Lisa, of The Save Inn Restaurant, wanted everyone to know that their son and his wife, Trisha, had recently opened up a copy shop in Kerrville. He went on to tell me that they can do just about any kind of printing including posters. “Harley, that’s great news!” I said. “I’m going to go see them, because I want to get a poster done for Tony. It’s going to be a surprise for him.”

Tuesday morning, I found a little bit of time, to work on my poster project. I ended up using two pictures of Blue, and the poem that Tony had written on the day that Blue died. It took me less than an hour to put it all together—using Adobe Photoshop, and then I burned it to a CD. And, then I told Tony about the poster, because I couldn’t keep the secret any longer.

That afternoon, we drove to Kerrville to get it printed! We drove to the print shop, walked inside and I said, “Hi. Are you Randy’s and Lisa’s son?”

This man looked at me like I was a crazy old lady. “What?” He asked. “Who is Randy and Lisa?”

I turned about five shades of red and Tony just stood there wearing a big grin. “Our friend’s son has just opened up a print shop and I thought this was it,” I explained.

“You’re talking about Copies Plus,” he said, “They’re down the road—next to Auto Zone.”

“Thank you,” I said, “I’m sorry.” And then we walked out of the business—feeling embarrassed. Tony teased me all of the way to Copies Plus.

When we found Copies Plus, Tony parked Buttermilk, and then we went inside. “Hi, welcome to Copies Plus. My name’s Trisha. What can I do for you?”

After introducing ourselves, and telling her about going to the wrong copy shop—I handed Trish the CD and explained what we needed to get printed. Trisha understood what we were wanting and she was very helpful. In less than five minutes, we left Copies Plus and headed home.

Yesterday morning, I received an e-mail from Trisha. She had sent me a proof and it looked great! She wrote to tell me that the poster would be ready today, and she wrote that she had a Heeler named Ziggy. She said that the pictures and Tony’s poem had touched her and she had played around a little, with my design and just wanted to show it to me.

When I looked at her design—I loved it and was so glad that she had included it in the e-mail! I immediately e-d her back, and told her that her design was fantastic and to please use it, instead of mine.

This morning I received another e-mail from Trish—the poster would be ready around noon! Tony couldn’t wait to see it, so at 11:30, Tony left the rescue ranch, to go pick up his poster at Copies Plus!

When Tony arrived back home—he was smiling from ear to ear—he loved his poster! When I saw it—my jaw dropped—it was absolutely beautiful! When Tony showed it to Ben and Maribeth—they thought it was great, too!

Because I was so thrilled about how well it had turned out—I called Trish. “Trish, this is Nancy. Tony just got home with your poster, and I am calling to thank you for doing such a great job. It’s perfect and we love it! And, I am so glad that we went with your design. Thank you so much for making Tony smile, again.”

P.S. Ben and Toto dropped in this afternoon—just to say hi!

P.S.S. Kinky is leaving tomorrow for his Amsterdam, England and Ireland tour with Little Jewford and Washington Ratso!